why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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