Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
