We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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