you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
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I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
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Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
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