Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize