Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize