fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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