Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

I think I just saw someone hide a body.

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(269): View more from Michigan

I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.

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(585): View more from New York

Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.

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(650): View more from California

so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.

(1-650): View more from California

did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...

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(224): View more from Illinois

Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...

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(416): View more from Toronto

Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding

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(865): View more from Tennessee

I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder

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(661): View more from California

just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking

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