Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
