Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
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