Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
