Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
