PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
