we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
