I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize