I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
