He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
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So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
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Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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