Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
