Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I currently don't understand fingers.
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