Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
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