Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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