Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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