ooooooooooooo i'm drink
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
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You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
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my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo