Texts From Last Night

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  (352): View more from Florida

  He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.

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  (352): He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies. http://tfl.nu/ks6d
  Replies (8) Good night (732) Bad night (3137)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.

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  (610): I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer. http://tfl.nu/q9nz
  Replies (104) Good night (1270) Bad night (3437)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!

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  (612): I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome! http://tfl.nu/jbu3
  Replies (21) Good night (5579) Bad night (595)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.

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  (612): you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all. http://tfl.nu/uo2n
  Replies (6) Good night (4925) Bad night (710)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?

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  (785): My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test? http://tfl.nu/em8d
  Replies (9) Good night (1078) Bad night (4009)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat

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  (978): Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat http://tfl.nu/7lwm
  Replies (18) Good night (4423) Bad night (855)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.

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  (207): He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job. http://tfl.nu/muvn
  Replies (7) Good night (2315) Bad night (1265)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.

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  (256): So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen. http://tfl.nu/ty3k
  Replies (3) Good night (2566) Bad night (693)
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  (845): View more from New York

  officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.

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  (845): officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand. http://tfl.nu/8nd1
  Replies (7) Good night (1541) Bad night (925)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  3pm strippers are depressing

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  (320): 3pm strippers are depressing http://tfl.nu/w12t
  Replies (19) Good night (915) Bad night (1900)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience

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  (401): it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience http://tfl.nu/4qkf
  Replies (11) Good night (544) Bad night (1649)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.

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  (240): I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first. http://tfl.nu/kk3c
  Replies (5) Good night (961) Bad night (631)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.

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  (970): Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush. http://tfl.nu/v4yp
  Replies (0) Good night (843) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower

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  (262): I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower http://tfl.nu/cieg
  Replies (7) Good night (957) Bad night (393)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  All's fair in love and war. and tinder.

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  (574): All's fair in love and war. and tinder. http://tfl.nu/9qeo
  Replies (0) Good night (369) Bad night (293)

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