This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Randomize
