I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
