well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
