You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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