He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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