How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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