you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
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