she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize