I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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