its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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