Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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