You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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