I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
