she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
