her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
