I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
try to milk me bitch
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