we have pet lesbian snakes
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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