If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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