Dual....:-)
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
