Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
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