I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Drunk is not a location!
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize