I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
