wake up i wanna do it froggy style
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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