At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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