I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
