Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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