dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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